"Big Mini Lessons"…is that an oxymoron?? Mini lessons, in the educational realm, mean short lessons that break difficult skills or concepts into smaller, more manageable pieces. As a teacher, I used mini lessons a LOT in my teaching. They are so practical and can make such a difference because you only teach one simple concept or skill at a time; then, more difficult skills and concepts can be added onto what the child has already learned. Well, lately, God has been using mini lessons to teach me more about being a godly wife and mother and friend and…well, just a more godly ME. As I've stop to reflect on these mini lessons, I've seen that they may be "mini", but they have big significance.
First, God has been re-teaching me about ministering to my husband. When we first got married, I was so thrilled and humbled to be Craig's wife. I really wanted to be the best wife that ever lived! I messed up A LOT, but everyday I prayed about how to be a better wife. I read verses and books about being a godly wife, and I put these things into practice. Now, fast forward seven years - a few moves and a couple of children later. While in my heart, I still want to be a godly wife, somewhere along the way, I lost the drive to do it. I quit trying. Maybe it's because I have more responsibilities than I used to. I mean, the kids (and animals) have to be fed (and bathed and played with and disciplined and taught). The supper has to be cooked. The house has to be cleaned. And I would like to shower at least every other day. That's not too much to ask, right??
Now, don't get me wrong. Craig and I have a great marriage. We love each other. We laugh together. We spend quality time together. We help each other with the kids and the house and the yard. We encourage each other. We hug and kiss...and more ;). We tell each other that we love each other. I'm not saying that our marriage has deteriorated or that I quit being a loving wife. I just quit trying so hard. You know, when you get into a habit of doing something, that thing starts to come a little more easily. Well, I got into a habit of being a "good" wife, and it got easy. So, I quit trying. I got comfortable. Then, one day, I woke up and realized that not only am I'm no where near the wife I need to be or should be, but I'm not even as good a wife as I was in that first year! There are some areas in which I've improved. I am 7 years wiser, after all; but I am not nearly as conscientious about ministering to my husband as I once was. Therefore, he all-to-often gets pushed to the back burner.
When my husband should be my number two priority (behind God only), he often gets put behind the kids and the house work and the church and the outreach/service projects and the girl friends. Like I said before, I still spend time with him and do things with him; and I love him dearly. In my heart, he's still number two! However, my time and focus and energy are often focused more on other things than on him. I spend time on my blog, documenting cute things my children did or said or posting pictures. I spend time on Pinterest looking for ideas to decorate the house or activities to do with the children or recipes to make. I spend time on Facebook, catching up on others' lives. I spend time reading books, mostly parenting books, to help me know how to train my children to be godly or avoid tempter tantrums or raise silly boys to be godly men or be a positive mom. I scour the internet and wrack my brain for service project ideas that I can do with my toddler so he'll have a servant's heart. When I have spare time, I look for areas of my home that need attention - closets that organizing, areas of the back yard that need cleaning up, etc. All of these things are fine and good, except that they take up so space in my life and in my schedule that there is not time for anything else. My days are filled. And while most of the things that fill my life are wonderful and beautiful (like playing all afternoon at the park with my boys as I did today), there is something I'm missing. I'm missing precious opportunities to minister to my husband - the one I am called…nay, commanded to put before everyone and everything other than God.
So, I'm committing to change. I guess I should say that I'm submitting to change. God has been turning the focus of my heart back toward my precious Craig, and now it's time for my schedule and my priorities to reflect that. How will that look? I'm not exactly sure. I feel confident that it will look different every day. There are a few changes, though, that I know I need to make, habits I need to change, practices that need to become priorities. I'll be posting more on that in my next post. Stay tuned! :)
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